we are His children.

on monday, which is our sabbath day, after a girls brunch, the curtis family, my roommate abby and i adventured out into rosarito to an orphanage. we drove around, went up and down and around bumpy roads until we came to our destination, a brick house behind a white stone wall. after some horribly awkward introductions (they didn't speak english and we tried to speak spanish but mine isn't the greatest), we awkwardly stood around until one the kids, pablo, brought out a flat yellow ball and threw it around. 

but, kids are kids. thankfully, when you play you don't need to speak much... except maybe to understand the rules of the games, haha. in the beginning, I was playing ball-tag with the kids and I was running around hoping that I was playing it right! from there, we started doing gymnastics and cart-wheels and having races "corre, corre, rapido!" (run, run, fast!)

in the midst of these games, I tried to converse with these precious children my limited spanish. so I asked them the basics "what's your name?" and "how old are you?" and they asked me the basics "do you have children?" and "do you have a husband?" and then, the one that broke my heart "do you have a mom?"

yes, yes I do.


and the reason that you are here is because you don't.

wow. talk about putting a face to brokenness and heartbreak.

after running around, trying to understand the rules of the games, laughing, doing many cartwheels, holding hands and making friends, all too soon it was time to go.

and so we circled up, held hands and prayed.

gracias, Jesus, por tu amor - thank you Jesus for your love.

this past Friday, I had the morning off and sat in the dts classroom. the topic of the week was the Father Love of God. throughout the Bible, we read about and see the Father heart of God.

ephesians 1:4 --> God dreamed about you before the world began. He has a plan for your life.

jeremiah 1:4 --> before the creation of the world, He called you and appointed you.

psalm 139 --> He knows all of you because He created all of you.

jeremiah 29:11 --> His plans for you are good. all His thoughts towards you are good. He has a purpose for you and for your life.

philippians 1:6 --> He will complete the work, the good work, He has begun in your life.

my God is a good Father. yes, there are things in this life that I don't understand why He allows them to happen, like allowing children, precious children, to grow up without a mom or dad, but He is control. He is charge. He a good, good Father.

and He has called me to be His child.

He is calling you to be His child.

and all you have to do to live as His child is ask Him. He is there for you. He is ready for you. He already loves you. He has already called you and He is just waiting for you to call Him.

and if you confess your sins, He will forgive. And He will send you His Spirit to live inside you.

God, our Father God, the God of the universe, promises to make His home with whoever loves Him and keeps His Words (John 14:23).

God in you.

and ask Him, He will come: "I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you." (John 14:18)

He will not leave us as orphans.                                                                                                                          

He loves those precious children in that orphanage more than we will ever know. He has a plan for them that is beyond our comprehension.

He loves these precious girls i nanny for more than i will ever know. He has a plan for them that is beyond our comprehension.

He loves me more than i will ever know. He has a plan for me that is beyond my comprehension.

He loves you more than you will ever know. He has a plan for you that is beyond your comprehension.

Gracias, Jesus, por tu amor - thank you Jesus for your love.

Amen. 

these precious little hands

what I do around here can be summed up in 2 words "little hands."

those hands are numerous.

they could be the hands of the precious girls i nanny for, the hands of the adorable children i see, clean and hold in the preschool i help out at here on the base or the hands i played with at Zone Kids* which is a ministry to the kids in the red light district in Tijuana.

awwww, so cute, right?

yeah, these kids are pretty cute and i keep reminding myself of the awesome privilege i have to love on all these children.

but then there are "those" days. we all know those days right? the days where runny noses are plentiful, where obeying is a struggle, where you don't understand enough spanish to "get by," where your expectations get in the way and where God breaks your heart and you don't know what to do with your own brokenness.

so here i am.

and God knows. and that's the beauty of it.

He knows.

the other night, some of the dts students and i went to hear dan baumann speak (he's an amazing man, used of God - his story). his story is amazing. i was blown away by the goodness of God, the love of God and His amazing plan for our lives. oh friends, God is good. God knows. He does.

He knew this week would break me. He knew i needed to be reminded of Truth. and so before the week began, He encouraged me through this man. God loves me. God has an amazing plan for my life. and this, this season here in Mexico as nanny-jodi, is a part of His story for me and His story for this precious family i'm serving here.


remember those days? yeah. those days where your expectations ruin everything because your day didn't go according to your plan?

today was that day. eh, let me rephrase that: this week didn't go according to "my plan."

expectations are odd things. we create in our minds what we think should happen before we have begun that said thing and then when things don't go as we think we get frustrated because we think we are in control.

remember the goodness of God? remember, He knows best.

anyways, i came to Mexico and i had expectations. i thought i knew what to do and how to nanny and i thought i knew it all. i thought i knew best.


i don't.

tonight i was reminded of this Truth (that God knows best) thru a speaker who shared during our weekly worship time. he talked about namaan in the Bible. in 2 kings 5, we read about this commander who had leprosy. this man heard about Elisha, the man of God who could heal him. so Namaan went to Elisha. and Elisha sent his servant out to meet Namaan and the servant told the commander to go wash in the Jordan river.

Namaan went away sad and upset because not only did he not talk to the prophet, but he was told to wash in that dirty Jordan river. Namaan knew of better, cleaner and closer rivers to wash in. why would he go there?

Namaan had expectaitons. he thought the prophet would honor hims by talking to him face-to-face. he thought the prophet would honor him by waving his hand over his leprosy and he would be healed. he thought the prophet would honor him by telling him to wash in a cleaner river. he thought. he thought. he thought.

just like i think. i think i know best. i think i deserve the best. i think i deserve honor. i think.  i think. i think.

but God knows best.

and spoiler: Namaan does go into the Jordan River and he washes himself there. and not once. not twice. but seven times. and he is healed.

God knows.

He has plans for us, good plans.

God is working in us and He will finish it.

Allow Him to break your expectations. Trust in His plan even if it is a crazy as washing yourself seven times in a dirty River. Trust Him. He knows best.

*let me tell you about Zone Kids! this ministry is amazing! and again, God's ways are beyond our comprehension. He allowed me to meet the leaders of this ministry thru the girls i nanny before i was even invited to go along! God is good!

While the girls played with the children of the leaders of Zone Kids, i was able to hear about their heart for these kids in the red light district and how the ministry was started. God orchestrated this couples meeting and their hearts for these kids. and through prayers and discerning God's will, they started this ministry, kinda like weekly vbs, for these kids a few years ago. and it has grown to include their moms!

so every Tuesday at 2:30, the zone kids team meets for prayer and preparations. and then they head off to the heart of Tijuana. When they arrive they set up games and toys for the kids who are between toddlers and middle schoolers. They kids play for about 45 minutes and then the younger kids go to a lesson and craft while the older kids can either learn guitar or photography! And while the kids are playing and learning, the moms are fellowshipping over cups of coffee, encouraging each other and learning about Jesus too!

all this is done at a local park in downtown Tijuana but the leaders informed me that they just were able to purchase property so their presence there can be more consistent!

i am so excited to become more involved with this amazing ministry every Tuesday while i'm here!

i'm here!

hello from the YWAM base here in Tijuana!

honestly, it feels like i've been here for a very long time and then i remember that it's only been 4 days. and other times i still feel like a rookie because i don't know that many people (and there's a lot of people here) and the girls and i are still getting to know and trust each other and we haven't adjusted to the schedule here yet. so there's just a mix of emotions.

and it's in this beautiful mess of emotions and feelings, that i trust God's plan. He brought me to this place. His leading was so sure that even in these moments of doubt and hardship and of breakdowns and crying, i trust Him.

and so here i rest. trusting in His plan.

 my prayer as i embarked on this journey was that i would be content with God has given me. i went out for lunch with a mentor of mine the day before i left and i shared some fears with her about how maybe i wouldn't have friends or how i might not get along with my roommates, and she asked me why i am going. i said to love on 4 precious girls. her response was "is that not enough for you?"

is that not enough for you?

is each smile, each flower they pick for me, each hand in mine, each time they yell out "jodi"and come running to me to give me a hug not enough?

this year, on January 1, i started reading thru the Bible in one year. and so the other day, my assigned reading was 2 Samuel 12, which is where nathan the prophet rebukes david for his sin with bathsheba. because most of these stories are not new to me, my prayer is that God would reveal something new to me each time I read these familiar stories. in the midst of Nathan rebuking david for his sin, he points out all the blessings that God has lavished onto david. and then he said this:

"...and if this were too little, I would add to you as much more..."

wow, talk about a slap in the face. why are we not content with all the blessings God has given us? here i am in Mexico, complaining. how immature. how rude of me to discard all the blessings God has given me and wish for more?

He has untrusted me the privilege of loving on these girls.

and when i stop and look around, i wanna slap myself in the face for not being thankful for all that God has blessed me with. why is it so easy to focus on all that we don't have? i don't wanna live this way. i desire to live a life of gratitude. to thank Him for every little thing.

to thank Him for the friendships I have made over a taco lunch after church yesterday.

to thank Him for each conversation with my 3 roommates, whether that's in the bathroom as we get ready for bed or an invite to play volleyball.

to thank Him for each sunrise and sunset over the Pacific Ocean with a perfect view of the painted sky from my bedroom.

to thank Him for leading me to this place.

to thank Him for his grace and gentle leading as i learn these lessons of gratitude.